Accountability. That’s what this post is about. I saw this horrendous musical and visual abortion rearing it’s head up all over the internet for the past couple of days and I was at a loss for words, not a common occurence for yours truly. Although I’m only perpetuating the efforts of this stupid piece of shit by embedding the video here, it needs to be done so you can feel the same degree of boiling rage that I feel. So, please take a minute to watch.
Yeah, that happened. Shit like this happens a lot. These rich and famous douchebags somehow rose to fame because they push stupid shit like this all over the internet and television until we’re forced to know who they are by name. Our anger, however, is usually misplaced on the face that’s pushed out to the public. So who’s really to blame? The parents? No. They were merely conceiving a child, and, despite any parents’ efforts to raise a well-rounded and decent person, only the person themselves can really determine who they will turn out to be. So is it the puppet? No. The only things you can truly pin on any of these pathetic individuals are their ability to not die and having the minimal business acumen to take an opportunity to get paid and cash in on it. There are far more devious villains at work here. These assholes are the corporate big-wigs, the spreaders of this filth, and those behind the scenes that bring these atrocities into fruition in the first place.
This particular crime against society, however, will not go without blame. These people will not escape our scorn and ridicule any longer. I did some research and found the people you should really be pissed at.
1. Christina Norman: Former President (2005-2008) – MTV: Music Television
Christina used to run shit over at MTV’s sister company, VH1. She was promoted by Van Toffler, President, MTV Networks in May of 2006, to the President of MTV Television. Coincidentally, this happens to be the exact time when MTV Television decided to focus it’s efforts on reality television. This newfound approach to MTV’s media networks directly led to the employment of the next person on this list and his little creation that led to Spencer’s fame in the first place.
2. Adam Divello: Creator & Executive Producer – The Hills
Adam Divello’s “The Hills” debuted on May 31, 2006. The premise was simple enough, follow the lives of several young people living in Los Angeles. Adam and MTV were sure they had a hit on their hands, except they made one fatal error. They chose Heidi Montag as a cast member. Spencer, having had a taste of reality television on “The Princes Of Malibu”, quickly squirreled his way into her dumb heart and as a result gave Spencer his initial large exposure to the MTV demographics. This exposure was his real start in television. Without “The Hills”, no exposure. No exposure, no invitation by NBC for the show “I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here”. No show invitation, no theme song creation.
3. Steve Morales: Producer – “I’m A Celebrity (Get Me Out Of Here)”
Here’s the jackass responsible for producing the song in the first place. I won’t even justify a bio for this one. Fuck you dude.
4. Ryan Seacrest: Host – On Air With Ryan Seacrest
Ryan Seacrest, the man with like 40 jobs, hosts a morning program called On Air With Ryan Seacrest from Los Angeles. He debuted the single first on May 11, 2009. Proof here. If you Google the song you’ll find corroborating evidence all over the place. Your role in this was not missed, Seacrest. Your dirty little fingerprints are all over the body.
5. Spencer Pratt: Director – I’m A Celebrity (Get Me Out Of Here) Music Video
I really tried my best to focus on everyone else in this list, but this mother fucker just keeps jumping up in front of the crosshairs. I’m not going to place blame on him for the actual song being created, that falls squarely on the shoulders of Steve Morales. The topic of this post, however, were the 5 people responsible for the video. Spencer directed this video. You can go back to hating him now.