High Definite/Retarded People

Filed.  United States District Court.  Colorado, CO.

Background | Thanks Julie.

My attempt at a transcript after the jump: Read more…

Click to enlarge.

If found, please put this cat out of her misery.  Also, I can’t prove it but I think that quote from Amber is made up.

Via

Your dad’s on the internet doing his kung fu moves and embarrassing the shit out of you.  Happy Thursday.

Thanks Brandon.

What do you do if a passenger accidentally hits you with the luggage they’re trying to get down from the overhead bin and doesn’t want to apologize?

If you’re ex-Jet Blue flight attendant Steven Slater, you curse the gentleman out over the intercom, grab two beers from the galley, and make your dramatic getaway down the inflatable emergency slide (presumably sobbing the entire time).

Full story here. | Thanks Julie.

Jessi Slaughter returns to inform us we can’t stop her and that we are all bitches.  I hope this ends exactly like last time.

Update: She deleted the original.  Fortunately, the internet doesn’t forget.

Via | Previously: Consequences Will Never Be The Same

Something tells me you’re going to get your money’s worth, though.

Via

This was bouncing around on Tumblr this morning.  Names, content… none of it’s important.  The only thing you need to remember is the rage you feel after watching this girl talk for 2 minutes.

I know…rage. It’s okay.  Justice is served.

As inevitable as the Nigel de Jong Kick/ Mortal Kombat mashups.  Headphones.

Via

Rich from FourFour and Gabe from Videogum put together another supercut of the most frequently said phrase on reality television.  I think it’s safe to say none of these people should ever have a problem not making friends.

Previously